dear long, beautiful hair,

i know we had our good times,
and life was great there for a while…
ya know, when you were long and pretty,
and made me feel beautiful…
when mornings were no big deal,
and day 2 and 3 hair was ideal…

it was me, not you.
i made a hasty decision after months of neglet,
and new-mom dry-spells and damage,
and i let you go.
{after months of begging my short hair-hating husband to do so…}

mark it – it will not be happening again.

in the past, i have had friends or family who could cut my hair,
but in the last few years, i haven’t always,
so it makes me practically refuse to pay more than $40-50 to get my hairs did.
it just felt so… high-maintenance.

i would like to repent for this thought and amend my previous opinion to simply: maintenance.
cause that’s what it is.

i have already had the conversation with cc so he knows:

me: what will you tell me when i try to mom-chop my hair again?
cc: i will hide all the scissors.
me: right, ok, and then?
cc: then i will show you pictures of you from when you had great hair… and when you didn’t….
me: and THEN???
cc: then i will send you with a $100 to a salon to get it done…
me: you are correct sir. 

my college headshot

here’s the deal:
few things make me feel beautiful these days.

a pedicure does the trick,
my temporarily long lashes will do it,
of course my husband is great at saying the right things when i need it…

but my hair was one of my favorite qualities.
one of those things that i could count on even if i was having a dry skin day
or a fat day.  at least my hair would be on my side…

and now-a-days, my hair is in that awkward not quite short but not quite long stage.
and usually lives out it’s days in a frizzy ponytail/bun thing.
which is great cause i get to run into perfect beautiful san diegan neighbors with great hair, boobs, and butts, on a daily basis….

cc and i have had conversations about budgeting a lot
and when i realized i had let my hair go another few months without a cut,
i also realized that haircuts were never put in the budget.

now, we are not the best at following the budget,
but lately we are good at tracking everything we spend.

i highly recommend it.
we use {the app}
because it will let us apply every transaction to a category…etc.
well, haircuts fall into the category that is quickly becoming a 4-letter word with me:
“out of budget”

final answer:
i declare that haircuts are a preventative measure 
against future therapy costs.
in the end, it would be better to keep a woman feeling good about herself than the alternative.

{which in my case was a streak of shopping,
and eventually chopping off my then very dry and damaged hair…}

i know that is melodramatic. maybe i could even change it to
regular haircuts prevent hours of much needed 
validation and listening to complaining…

cause i am still complaining a little bit.

and dear cc,
you were right,
i guess i should have known….
you did grow up with all girls after-all!