the recap of this week:
went to acupuncture twice,
went to chiropractor 3 times,
did every inversion i knew,
handstands in the pool…
prayed lots and tried to stay as positive as i knew how…
the last few days were creeping in with different birth plans,
and it was hard to imagine anything the way i planned it in my mind before…
both my chiropractor and acupuncturist were wonderful.
so positive and full of energy that i was hopeful,
both reminded me that if he doesn’t move,
i have done all i could, and it is probably for a good reason…
i started to agree,
and thought about how much
little Boston is already so much like his dad.
if there is even the chance of getting caught in a sticky situation,
even a hint of danger ahead,
he doesn’t even entertain it.
stubbornly brilliant at protective instincts.
the thought made me smile and have a little more peace.
wednesday morning,
i visited sandy, my favorite of the 3 midwives.
i told her about my horrible experience with the other midwife and asked that i not see her…
she listened and helped me stay positive too,
she also told me that the other two were on call for the next two weeks,
but i could ask to have someone else cover if i went into labor over the due date weekend…
huge burden lifted.
yesterday morning,
i picked up cc and we drove to the hospital.
i was feeling positive,
trying to stay relaxed,
but it was ultimately hard to picture the excitement of going into labor
that i was so ready to experience…
the OB that works at my office came in.
he is a younger man,
possibly still in his 30s,
and witty and fun.
he reminded me of my brother, rob,
which is probably why i calmed so easily.
he tried moving the baby a few times,
and i did my best to try to breathe-
i am sure it is the
most painful event i have volunteered for…
most painful event i have volunteered for…
he didn’t move at all,
but i kept making him try… over and over…
the nurses thought i was crazy for keeping at it…
chris held my hand and cried, watching as i wept through it…
it wasn’t the pain, but the realization that he wasn’t going to move…
no matter how much i tried to visualize or tell him to…
i lay there weeping, with my husband smiling at me,
and the OB tried to cheer me up,
he said,
“this was a planned pregnancy, right?
well, i am sure your first thought after you got pregnant wasn’t
‘man i can’t wait to push a huge thing out of my vagina!'”
i threw my head back laughing and cried even more.
he is right.
we came here to have a baby,
and that is just what we will do.
it took me over 30 minutes of sobbing to calm down,
but when he mentioned february 28th as a possible c-section date,
i agreed.
{that means i get to see him instead of midwives to the end too- a plus}
it will be my g-ma moffat’s birthday,
and i know that he wont be moving on his own at this point…
cc had the rest of the day off
and he spent it holding me and trying to keep me busy.
and he spent it holding me and trying to keep me busy.
he let me cry it out and reminded me that i did everything there was to do…
it makes me cry all over again to think of how lucky and blessed i am.
thanks again for all of your thoughts, prayers, and advice,
the good news is: i may have a healthy little boy in 10 days,
and my little hormonal and slightly broken heart can almost not handle the thought….
again, proof that heavenly father loves me.
I love you Megs! I can't wait for little B. However he gets here. As always, I'm praying and thinking of you. 🙂
that's good to remember: no matter how he comes, you will have a little boy soon!
I'm sure everyone imaginable has told you that the last bit is the hardest so I won't say that. I will say best of luck and you can most certainly do it!! When I was having some issues my last few weeks, my mom kept reminding me how very blessed we are to live in a place where we have access to health care and that our babies- no matter how they come- are such a blessing. Best of luck!!!!
I just read your post and can't help think Boston must be so glad his mom and dad-<br /><br />1) have done everything to make sure he is born healthy and safe<br /><br />2) that they take lots of pictures for the peeps who won't get to see him right away..and good ones at that<br /><br />3) that his parents "planned" on having him (not to mention his upcoming siblings) and are
I echo the support you have already received. You are gonna make some serious lemonade out of a very tiny lemon here. IN fact, I am making lemonade cookies in your honor today. i hope you enjoy them vicariously. We believe in that right?
Your beautiful, perfect natural birth with #2 will be even more sweet and cherished because of what you're going through now. Hugs to you! And 10 days!!! How exciting!
I got a little teary eyed reading this post Megan. I hope you know that however this little, precious baby boy decides to come to earth… it will be the most joyous, incredible experience of your entire life. The second they lay him on your chest will be so happy you won't even know what to do with yourself. I know it is disappointing not being able to do it naturally, like you've
I too got teary reading this. And it's not just the pregnancy hormone either! 😉 It was just so well written! Meg, you are awesome. Your determination is incredible. You did do everything that you could possibly have done! And now you get to meet your little guy earlier, that's gotta be exciting! Things happen, and not always the way we went, but you are being watched over, and you will
We love you, Meg. I hope through this you can take great peace in knowning you did EVERYTHING you could to receive your desired outcome and now though it is in hands other than your own, those hands are very capable and compassionate to your case. We are so happy that Boston is healthy and that you have the wonderul support you do from those close to you to see you through this. You are strong,
ditto ditto! And we will have ALL of our phones (& computers) right by our sides -at every moment- that whole day anxiously awaiting his arrival! So excited we can hardly stand it! Ya for more cousins! love you!
Wow, that stirred up a lot of emotions, I know this comment is a little late. I just want you to know that you are not alone. I was seeing midwives and found out at 5 months that I had a bicornate uterus and Isaac wasn't going to be able to flip (I still went to the chiro and did every yoga move I read about to try…) It was a hard blow… I never wrote about any of it or his birth story or