cue the Charlie Brown pity music…

sometimes being single is purely pathetic

like having to take yourself out on a hot date—and enjoying it…for the most part.

last night i went to see “Berlin” the musical put on by BYU at the LDS Motion Picture Studio. i have to say i was impressed. naturally, i will review the details of my adoration for said entertainment on the other blog, but this is beside the point.

i wore these hot green shoes, (as i have been wearing green all week to prepare), and a green shirt to match. and i am on my 2nd or third day of straight hair, which for me—makes it great.

problem: getting dressed up and seeing a show by myself is in a lot of ways very fulfilling. i can cry all i want and no one will say anything about it. i can fall in love with the male lead (which happens more than i care to admit) and not feel guilty for swooning.

i have to say though, there is nothing more lonely than coming out of a great show, that i wasn’t in, and (after giving my love to 1/2 the cast that i know and love) i just leave. i can’t even talk about it really. i can’t sit with my show-going lover that also enjoyed the experience and say, “yeah- and like how they did this… so cool huh!” and there is something about the “all dressed up with nowhere to go” syndrome. i feel that is a real condition of quasi-depression.

the next hour of my date therefore consisted of driving around and singing in my car because i just didn’t want to go home. 1/2 of my apartment is in San Fran this weekend visiting cute married people and taking great pictures anyway, and i already blew through most of the Office… so i drove around and listened to some songs that made me think of the places here and the memories i have attached to them. it is wierd that i have been here for 3 years when i look back.

finally, i caught up with some friends and filled my night with some laughing and snacking and Arrested Development… and felt a little better.

as a side note: i thought guys liked it when you were straightforward with them. i could have sworn that being honest was the way to go. so why then should i feel bad when i admit i am not interested? should i be punished for that? example: ‘i would rather not go do that, but can we do lunch?’ No. i don’t want to ever talk to you again…ever! uh…. ok?

so maybe i feel lonely because i sometimes feel that i am trapped in a sandbox with kids who don’t play nice!


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Meg

About Meg

I am Meg, a photographer and designer and a wish-i-owned-a-house-er. My husband and I are self-declared foodies and LOVE projects. We blog about food and DIY adventures from sunny San Diego with our two cutie kids and have an apparel line at colormeapparel.com to keep us busy. Email me at colormemegblog@gmail.com to work with me!

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